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Street Tales Character: Xander by ~Viewer934:iconViewer934:


©2009 ~Viewer934
:iconviewer934:

Artist's Comments

the concept profile for Lucario's mentor.

Pokemon (c) Nintendo, Game Freak

Street Tales (c) Adept-eX

artwork (c) viewer934

EDIT: I have changed the design of Xander and his backstory.

Comments


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:iconadept-ex:
Well man, now I have time to comment you properly.

You have to excuse man if I sound harsh or meanie, but I must say the design and story of the character is mediocre.
Come on, is too stereotypical the mysterious cloaked guy with practically no past. You practically don't say anything about the guy like her character, personality or attitude or how was the relation with his Pokémon, there isn't any clue or hint about him or about his past. A person that don't know anything about your characters could thing: "Man, this guy is lazy and didn't make a story for his character"

Also the reason why he left to Lucario is poor or at least, it isn't well explained. For make him excessively mysterious you committed the mistake of gave him a weak background to his story and character, and also you made him too stereotypical.

You must work more with this character, specially if was so influent on the Lucario's life.

Another detail is the style of the both characters doesn't fit. Lucario has a oriental style but this guy has the generic style of an old English detective or agent (like the Inspector Gadget), I think if the both characters are partners then the both should have a similar style for the mutual influence and respect. Don't you think?

Now again, excuse me if I was too harsh with my critique ^^;, but really you must work more with this character... I hope that my review can be useful.

~Bye

--
Let's gonna unleash our inner artist ;P
~Adept-eX
:iconviewer934:
Thank you for the review, I'll admit the Van Helsing look is kind of stereotypical and unfitting to Lucario's look, so I'll change him to either a samurai or a ninja.

Also I guess I could elaborate on how he met lucario, and Why he left. But as for what his past was before he met Lucario, that I wish to save for further into the story, IF that is alright with you. Because I believe that's how Xander is, his past was so dark he wishes to leave it behind.

Besides everyone loves a good mysterious person. But it's up to you whether or not I take this course of action, it IS your story after all.

Anyway I will redo his story, and his appearance. Be sure to tell me what you think of the others too.

Cheers~Viewer934

--
"And my army of brothers went over the hilltops, drenched in blood we may be... but fighting is all left to me... Together with my army of brothers... down we fall... darkness in all... through hell!"
:iconviewer934:
Okay, I've changed his look and his backstory. please tell me what you think of him now...

--
"And my army of brothers went over the hilltops, drenched in blood we may be... but fighting is all left to me... Together with my army of brothers... down we fall... darkness in all... through hell!"

Details

June 4
39.0 KB
77.3 KB
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